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Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Rough few weeks & new Ta tas!

It's been rough couple week! I guess I am feeling the uglies!

I wish I could write that I am more positive but it's difficult when you look in the mirror and I can't recognize myself!   I am all done with chemo, and I am happy about that! I am just waiting for it all to be out of my system! I did end up getting the nuelesta shot, but only in half a dose. Because I broke out in hives last time! So this week, I am having/feeling the uglies...I am puffy, tired and I am sick of my wig!!!


So I had a dr. Appointment this past week and as I was getting ready and noticed I still had my eye lashes and was thankful for that, so I decided to put on some mascara (not something I wear on a regular basis.) got my self all ready, put on my wig that I am sick of already!  Got to the dr's appointment and the first thing the nurse said was how are you? and "you look tired":(   I knew I looked puffy, but was hoping it was just something only I could see! So basically it's been a rough week,... wanting to stay in bed till all my symptoms go away or maybe till my hair grows back!!!!!!  I know that seems extreme, but when you lose your hair you almost seem entitled to whine a bit!!!!....maybe wine would help?   Who knows?...well not till the chemo is out of my system....grrrr!!!!

I have one more surgery, and that is for the new Ta tas...and I am so ready for them and ready for all of this to be over!  It's probably a good thing I am not drinking, cause I would probably be a lot more honest in my feelings!

 Well, on to a different subject...I miss my son who is at boot camp for the Navy and he is more than half done...yeah!  Only two more weeks!!!

I watched a really good movie the other night that some of you may have heard of and I have seen it before, but it really hit home since Clay is now in the navy.  It's called "Men Of Honor" with Robert Deniro and Cuba Gooding,Jr.  It is based on a true story of a African American sailor named Carl Brashear. This man faced all kinds of prejudice and would never except anyone telling him he could not do something! It's incredibly sad that this kind of prejudice went on and I am so glad that our society is way past this kind of discrimination! I wished my son had watched this movie before he left, because I want him to know, that some things may not be easy but if you want it bad enough...it is possible! That is what inspired me from this movie! If you have not watched this movie or you need inspiration...watch it, you will love it!  I also loved the theme song ..."Win" by Brian McKnight

My whining was for the last few weeks..  I think it was because this last round of chemo knocked me on my bum, and my last fill in my expanders was rough, kinda felt like I was caring around bricks on my chest!

  But this last week "Monday 27th" . I finally got my new Ta tas, they seem smaller than what I thought which is probably a good thing. (I know dad....la la la)  I'm still wrapped like a mummy, so I won't know till later?..so now on onto the healing thing!!!!
 LET THE HEALING BEGIN!

  YEAH...It will be nice to getting back to normal!

2 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry for your discomfort and blahs! You have every right to feel awful right now, so do it!! Whine all you want! It's always darkest before the dawn! You will be feeling better in know time! The chemo is leaving your body everyday and taking along with it your blahs! I understand missing Clay! He must be getting pretty excited for PIR! You will have such a great time and be so proud of him!!
    Love ya

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  2. Thanks Charlotte, you could not have said it better! Love ya!

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